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Lyrics of 'Revenge On The Nursemaid' by The Deadfly Ensemble

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My nursemaid once gave me a kiss and a farthing. Two pence would have made sense; this was alarming. I was a good boy! I never got sick! So this slice of a penny induced a coin trick.

I traded my farthing for an old metal soldier which I sold to my brother, a collector, much older. He gave me a penny which then begat three when I found for the soldier some staunch company.

My threepenny bit soon turned to a tanner when I resold some fruit; some plums and bananas. A half-shillings worth of shoe polish came next, and two bob from the bank men left my pockets perplexed.

With florin in hand I set up a stand and sold Penny Dreadfuls at second hand. Inside of a week Id made half a crown, and my story appraisals had earned some renown.

For one sovereign, one guinea, I sold off my stock and found my revenge when the nursemaid was shopping; she cried at the till, All I need is two pence! Said I, All Ive got is ten pound, four and six.

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• An Entire Wardrobe of Doubt and Uncertainty
• Black-Capped Chaplains- A Christmas Carol
• Bruise Animals
• Cariadoc's Kiss
• Dirty Weather
• Dishonest Corset
• Horse On the Moor
• In Defense of a Threepenny Purse
• John Fall Apart John
• Meaty Bones and Porridge
• Midsummer William
• Millions of Flies
• Polymelia and the Satyr
• Queen Maude's Pirates
• Revenge On The Nursemaid
• Tea With Honey
• the Anatomist
• the Flight of the Invisible Siamese Three-Year-Olds
• Ursusarktos The Bachelor

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