Lyrics of 'Backstage Scene' by Jerry Springer: the Opera (Musical)
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[WARM UP MAN]
Hey, Jerry,
What can I say man? Tough crowd!
[JERRY (spoken)]
Nice to see you, Jonathan.
[WARM UP MAN]
Sorry if I let those assholes get a little too loud,
[JERRY (spoken)]
Those assholes are my audience.
[WARM UP MAN]
Jerry, don't bullshit me,
You and me both, we know,
They are scum!
Filthy cocksucking scum!
[JERRY (spoken)]
And your job is to control those scum and keep them from upstaging my guests.
[WARM UP MAN]
Pimps and perverts,
Teenage whores,
People so fat they get stuck in revolving doors!
[JERRY (spoken)]
And we get them through those doors and onto a plane to Chicago.
[JERRY'S INNER VALKYRIE]
Sluts and faggots,
Gimps eating maggots.
[JERRY (spoken)]
We've never had a maggot eating gimp on this show!
[WARM UP MAN]
Jerry, you could do anything.
[JERRY (spoken)]
What are you talking about?
[WARM UP MAN]
You could run for Senate!
Or even president!
[JERRY (spoken)]
If I want my dick sucked, I'll call my agent.
[WARM UP MAN]
Looks like you're cruising,
Playing it safe.
[JERRY (spoken)]
You're way out of line, pal.
[WARM UP MAN]
You need a challenge,
And I've got just the thing,
Gonna make you sweat,
When you're in the ring.
[JERRY (spoken)]
Jonathan, let's cut this short.
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