Lyrics of 'The Best Things In Life' by Half Man Half Biscuit

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The Best Things In Life is a song by Half Man Half Biscuit whose lyrics have countless searches, so we decided it deserves its place on this website, along with many other song lyrics that internet users want to know.

My Uncle Charlie is a cynical man
And his wifes a touch skeptical, too.
They've got one of those stickers
In the back of their van; it says:
We've seen the prices at the zoo.
Well today I knocked upon their door
And said that I was passing,
And charlie launched a scathing attack.
When I asked him what I'd done, he said
"You stupid bastard! We live in a cul-de-sac!"

Went to Darlene's party; it was fancy dress.
I just stuck an apple in my face.
I saw a chap who obviously was out to impress,
Reckoned he'd beat Gagarin into space.
He said "Hi there {? souls! ?}
Like I'm sorry I'm late!
But I was getting done up
As a mobile thrash acetate!"
Me, I got bored
So I went home,
Got into bed,
And came to the conclusion...

There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Birol
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Birol
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Birol
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Birol
On a Saturday Night instead of going to a pub.

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